In the news....my news that is!

Most recent headlines.......I am fat.....my husband can officially run down our hallway.....my husband's disability check is late (go figure).....my kids are determined to break me......my dog puked in my livingroom.....the cat pissed in the bathroom and my son likes to shoot people....(zombie nazis)....and here comes a huge sigh....my 11 year old has boobs a butt and an attitude the size of alaska.....my husband is addicted to fishing for fish that are obviously (no offense Mr. Congo) smarter than him....he cant remember shit.....I cant hear shit....kids wont listen to shit....pms sucks....prostetics almost never fit.....drugs dont help anything.....our house is possessed.....car's breaks are screaming at me again.....the neighbors assume that as soon as July begins it is the 4th.....I have eight lighbulbs burned out and could care less.....my ice maker doesnt make ice.....my phone is going dead.....and I am losing my mind.....I am sure I will find it eventually.....like they say the journey is almost always better than the destination.....but all I have to say is.....ARE WE THERE YET????