Higher Learnin

Just wanted to say that I start school on Monday.....wish me luck. Now I am off to read the first two chapters of my psych textbook. It cant hurt to read ahead I figure. College should hopefully be a desirable challenge.....just enough info to keep my brain from crashing but awake enough to concentrate. I dont know. I just hope this college thing doesnt kick my ass. I really want to do well and succeed. Here's to a new normal in my life. I cant wait. I feel that since the past 5 years have been far from normal I can work towards something that I want and something that I desire for a change. I can only thank my husband for giving me this great opportunity.

Bugs, books, backpacks and bowls.....

SO there apparently is a 24 hour bug lurking in my house.....my husband has already had it and I felt bad cause he went out drinking the night before and I made fun of him cause he hasnt been hung over off three beers before. So then it turned out to not be that. Then I said maybe it was the food that your friend made late in the PM that got you sick.....nope wasnt that either. I love to give his friends shit though.....then I said well I guess the rat poison didnt get mixed in well enough.....we have a sick crazy humor with eachother......I would never poison my husband.....but the shitty part is that now I have the bug.....my four year old son had it when he went to Montana with the In Laws.....now its my turn.....as if I felt left out of the viral gift giving.....just sitting here with stomach pains waiting to throw up. Didnt sleep much at all last night due to thse f*ing stomach pains......but it also doesnt help that my son decided to sneak into bed with us last night and wet our memory foam bed that wasnt cheap. Atleast I was able to get my books for school yesterday with no issues. I tried on my backpack yesterday with my binder, books and supplies and I felt like a pack mule. If my giant boobies didnt give me permanent back problems then my load of school crap will definately seal the deal. I have been able to (surprisingly) keep down a crusty tasteless eggo waffle and some water.....not so convinced that the rest of my day I will be so lucky......gonna go lay down and prop myself up in front of the TV with a bucket. Wish me luck.

A bad day in a sea of good days

SO yesterday was not a severely bad day but it was one of the worst days recently in a sea of good days. I am glad that the good days outweigh the bad days in our lives recently. Still yesterday started out with me getting up early and eating some cereal and my husband finally got his hand cycle. Yay! He went for a ride and we met him at the bottom of our culdesac when he was on the way back up the hill and then we walked while he rode to the park. Seemed fun and my son was excited. So we get to the park and Chaise was excited to make the choice of what playground he wanted to play on.....next thing I know my husband is chucking frisbee golf discs my way.....he said he was gonna throw them and I said wait let me get out of the way. Well I was trying to dodge discs and they were coming high in the air and at that point the sun was in my eyes so I couldnt get out of the way from a disc that was thrown not straight but into the air. I tried to run out of the way but it came straight down on my back. Ok so for those of you who dont know what frisbee golf discs are......they are like frisbees only heavier and harder and they fly hard and fast when thrown. It felt like someone jumped onto my back with a flying kick. Anyway I was irritated cause it hurt and I couldnt understand why he would throw them at all when I hadnt gotten out of the way. So instead of opologizing and coming to see if I was ok.....he said what the hell where you doing why did you walk into it. Yeah my goal was to try to hit the disc with my body before it could hit me. So no sorry, no nothing just it was all my fault. I couldnt believe it. Then he proceeeded to act like nothing was wrong. My back hurt for a couple hours after that. I ended up walking home and my son was like Daddy why did you hurt mommy. I lost it and cried all the way home......a perfectly good waste of makeup I would say. It wasnt until hours later that I got an opology. We havent had something like that happen for a while. It ruined my whole day. Today I feel still blah. Hopefully today will be better.

Popcorn and a box of tissues

I dont usually cry much during movies and of course I am a girl and yeah I am a big wuss at times. So last night My son, Bill and I decided to wind down by putting in a boring movie and eating some popcorn in hopes that the kid would actually fall asleep before bed time. Sounds good right.....yeah but of course I must have read the wrong movie trailer preview because the movie was somber, and sad from start to finish. The movie is called "Taking Chance" its about a marine corps Cnl. (Kevin Bacon) who volunteers to escort the body of a young fallen Marine corps PFC thought to be from his home town area. The movie basically covers everything from the time the PFC was fatally wounded during combat by a stray bullet, through the transportation of his body to different locations, the cleaning, the honor and respect shown through the whole process, up to the transfer, and the ride home. I do not suggest watching this movie without a box of tissues. I cried through the whole movie.....and so did Bill. He actually had to pause it and take a break at one point. Needless to say the kid fell asleep but my eyes hurt today from the frequent watering of my cheeks throughout the movie. Its hard to answer to a four year old why they put ice in the box they transport bodies in, why they had to put the dead guy on a plane, and why he couldnt ride on the plane with everyone else......it was hard......but my child will have a sense of respect and pride as he grows into a man due to the honesty and the realness surrounding him throughout his life. On another note.....my four year old son started school yesterday and I went with him on the first day. Bill wanted to go but he was up all night previous throwing up for reasons still unknown. He always makes excuses for what it could be and doesnt go to the doctor.....stubborn Marines for ya! Blah.....anyway he had enough energy to go with me in the noon to pick him up from his first day and he was obviously well enough to ask why there was no flag out on the flagpole at the preschool.....the lady was a little embarassed by not having it out after that. I totally understand though.....just another day in the life of me......

Crazieness mixed with insanity.......

Oh lets just say that I seriously believe my husband is truly crazy......lol. I think he loves pain or something. Back in April when he had surgery on his crushed left calcaneous the doctors told him absolutely no weight bearing for 12 weeks no acceptions. The also told him to quit chewing because it helps you to heal better without tobacco in your system. Ok well he did surprisingly good on the no weight bearing.....better than I expected because his level of intensity and his Marine Corps standards just never allowed him to be anything less than his best whether he was knocked down or not. SO now that he is allowed to start walking "yet again", going back and forth between the wheelchair when he is hurting and then in between he uses crutches or canes.......now he is out changing the oil in his car, changing my tires, cleaning the garage, disc golfing, going to the driving range, making countless trips to the hardware store for supplies to modify his sport wheelchair.....for off roading, the skate park, and for outdoor use. He is into wheelchair extreme sports now.....so now that he is safe from suicide bombers, IEDs, and RPGs......he has to find a new adrenaline rush.....argh....I am contemplating buying him knee pads and elbow pads.....or I could just put him in a bubble so I can keep him around for a while......lol. Atleast he isnt in my house trying to fix electrical stuff.....I have to draw the line somewhere. I hate this house but I dont want it to burn down without my approval first.....this house is beginning to feel more and more miserable everyday. No money to fix it up to make it more appealing and the longer we stay here the more screwed up it gets from Bill's wheelchair not being able to fit through doorways and turn around......it sucks. I often think about just getting some c4 and taking a personal day to sit at the bottom of my driveway with some popcorn and a coctail and watch the house explode into a hazy cloud. It reminds me of the scene in the movie "Waiting To Exhale" where the lady finds out her husband has been sleeping with the white bitch at the office and she throws all his shit in his sweet ride and parks it in the driveway then sets it on fire and goes to take a nap. Anyway.....my husband found another colony of terrorist wasps in our garage and the firefight wages on!

Back to school is set in stone for me!

I finally after months of anticipation, have gotten my financial aid award letter for college. Its all good to go. All I had to do was accept my award and now its just a bit more waiting for school to start. I get to pick up my books on the 14th and then I start school on the 28th.....its slowly creeping up on me. I am a little nervous since I havent been in a classroom setting in over 10 years now. Its a little intimidating! Hopefully I will do well. If I couldve been as organized in high school as I am now then I think I wouldve done so much better and high school may not have been so horrible for me. Anyway i am excited to finally further my education and become someone my kids can be proud of as well as do something that I love to do and get paid to do it. I have to thank my husband though for the extra education benefits that I am recieving due to his 100% disability rating. If it werent for him then I may not have pushed myself to do this. I am super appreciative for all that I have.